It gets to a point where feeling numb takes a toll…not allowing yourself to feel, holding your heart in, battening down the hatches, withdrawing and holding back to try to preserve energy doesn’t work. It actually depletes you. Taking any action when you feel numb can be a challenge, but I can assure you it’s worth committing to “feeling” again so you can return to YOU.
Where to start? It begins with deep soulful rest. This is your pathway to restoring energy, but pay attention to the difference between deep rest and numbing. Few of us actually engage with the former.
We rather
~ numb
~ withdraw
~ block out
~ distract
Soulful rest is a space where we take time out, distraction free, to pour energy back into our field and ultimately allow ourselves space to feel.
Most women, especially when we have unconsciously committed to our numbness and not feeling, don’t allow what’s there to bubble up, be seen and witnessed because we’re “resting” with our phones, books, eating, movies…we intentionally block any emotion, thoughts and feelings to arise.
Often this is because we are afraid that if we let even a little of what we are holding in come to the surface, we will be unable to stop the outpouring once it begins. I know that feeling well and held onto numbness for a long time.
When I eventually allowed myself to just rest and be with no distractions, pouring light and energy into my field to “fill me up” I started to feel stronger. Then I allowed myself space to feel and release the years of pent up and suppressed feelings. What I experienced surprised me…when I allowed myself to deeply explore the feeling or painful event/memory the feeling was attached to, I was able to move through the feeling to a space of peace quite quickly. The more I did it, the faster this process became. The first few times I took my journal out at home or in nature I wrote pages and pages and pages. It was messy, often with tears and big feelings, and I kept writing until I felt complete each time. It brought deeper peace and relief…like I could see again.
It then became an ever improving cycle….I let my feelings out, wrote about them, felt them, released them…I then felt lighter, happier, more engaged with life and those I love. Gorgeous woman, I learnt then that when we as women, open and feel, our energy is energy amplified. When we are unarmored and open hearted, then energy can flow into us and through us like an open channel.
This can feel vulnerable and tender when you’ve been hurt, when you’ve felt depleted, when you’ve struggled, I get it. It’s hard to open your heart and energy field, and let yourself feel. It feels vulnerable. Messy. Out of control. Your trust wavers.
However, numbing and over protecting yourself uses energy and depletes you because it takes hard work to close yourself down in order not to feel.
A better way through is deep soul rest, time in nature and feeling. Be your own loving witness of your struggles and be the wise woman who holds your own heart and experiences with tenderness and compassion.
It doesn’t have to be neat and measured. In fact it can be messy and full of snot and tears!
Love Kareena x
Transformational Women’s Coach
